im going insane

listening to :

Crashed The Wedding by BUSTED

im outta my mind

seriously

xoxo

anger

anger building up
so close to exploding
i am so close to the edge
no second thoughts before knowing
my body shakes with anger
the line is so close
slowly starting to overstep that line
my eyes start to tear up
softly falling down my cheeks
anger invades me
precisely and carefully taking over
anger... anger... anger...
the human passion that can help or destroy me
i feel like im alone in this small world
but the anger becomes my friend
my body crumbles to the ground
i wake up screaming


xoxo

jason wade , his voice is amazing!

jason wade

he's an awesome guitarist

the lead vocalist

he's got the crowd goin, lol..

an awesome song writer

yesh, he plays the keyboard too ;P




their recent album ;D


his voice is addictive :D :D



LIFEHOUSE


xoxo

everything ; te quiero <3

Find me here , and speak to me
I want to feel you , I need to hear you
You are the light that's leading me
To the place where I find peace again

You are the strength that keeps me walking
You are the hope that keeps me trusting
You are the light to my soul
You are my purpose , you're everything

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me , how could it be any better than this?

You calm the storms and you give me rest
You hold me in your hands , you won't let me fall
You steal my heart when you take my breath away
Would you take me in take me deeper now

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me , how could it be any better than this?
and how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me , how could it be any better than this?

Cause you're all I want , you're all I need
You're everything, everything
You're all I want , you're all I need
You're everything, everything

You're all I want , you're all I need
You're everything, everything
You're all I want , you're all I need
Everything, everything

And how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better any better than this?

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me , how could it be any better than this?
Would you tell me , how could it be any better than this?



xoxo

the day he died ; it was 10 months today .

i was feeling sick . couldnt sleep yet again, and i figured...
there must've been something that has happened once today .

the day he left us, the day he went away . it was 10 months today .



i miss you still , i swear i still do



the time he left us was at 10:38am . i wasnt there with him, thts what sucked most .
by the time i went there, i was too late . he left .

the night before, i thought he'll be fine . he awoke from coma, he seemed fine .
we talked, we laughed, just like old times .

and before it was time for me to get back home...
he told me, he'll always be there to protect me . he whispered something i never thought he'll ever said .
" i love you, and will always be there for you, like always "


i cried .


every day i wait, every time i pray, im missing you .

i cant wait to see your smile again .


xoxo

i still love you, i swear i still do

FAR AWAY - NICKELBACK

This time, This place
Misused, Mistakes
Too long, Too late
Who was I to make you wait
Just one chance
Just one breath
Just in case there's just one left
'Cause you know,
you know, you know


[CHORUS]
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore


On my knees, I'll ask
Last chance for one last dance
'Cause with you, I'd withstand
All of hell to hold your hand
I'd give it all
I'd give for us
Give anything but I won't give up
'Cause you know,
you know, you know


[CHORUS]

So far away
Been far away for far too long
So far away
Been far away for far too long
But you know, you know, you know


I wanted
I wanted you to stay
'Cause I needed
I need to hear you say
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
So keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore
Believe it
Hold on to me and, never let me go
Keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore
Believe it
Hold on to me and, never let me go
Keep breathing
Hold on to me and, never let me go
Keep breathing
Hold on to me and, never let me go




xoxo

blue ; system of a down

I, wishing and wishing away as you go I, wishing and wishing away as you go I don't see nothing but pain and misery Cause you are the one for me Why can't it all be true Can I escape with my blue fallen reverie Why can't it all be true Why can't it all be true I, wishing and wishing away as you go I, wishing and wishing away as you go Suddenly I believe Your were the one for me Graciously you go through My closed heart's artery Can I escape with my blue fallen reverie Why can't it all be true Why can't it all be true I've been wishing away as you I've been wishing away as you I've been wishing away as you go I don't see nothing but pain and misery Cause you are the one for me Why can't it all be true Can I escape with my blue fallen reverie Why can't it all be true Why can't it all be true Wishing and wishing away as you go Wishing and wishing away as you go Wishing and wishing away as you go Wishing and wishing away as you go Wishing and wishing away as you go Wishing and wishing away as you go As you go As you go As you go xoxo

im bored, so here's a survey

001. Real name: Abbie Lyann Joseph 002. Nickname: bie. abbay. abbey . AJ . honeybee (only Pablo can call me this, lol) & abbay fabby wabby ( only, i repeat, only Jinnikins may call me this ) & a²rlj (Katherine ;D ) 003. Married: nope . 004. Zodiac sign: Aquarius . 005. Male or female: wht you think? 006. Race: Eurasion 007. High school: GARC 008. College: hopefully William Angliss' in Melbourne x) oh wait.. im not goin to melbourne anymore 009. Interest: music . art & dance 010. Short/long hair: its in between , lol . 011. Favorite music genre: rock xD 012. Favorite place to be: one utama 013. Colour: purrrrple ;D 014. Drinks / Food: alcoholic . thai, korean & mexican food . 015. Are you a health freak: yesh, burgers are healthy . 016. Height: dunno x) 017 . Do you have a crush on someone: mayb xD 018. Do you like yourself: hardly do . 019. Piercings: four *damn, i want more!* 020. Tattoos: not yet ;D 021. Righty or lefty: righty . FIRSTS : 022. First surgery: when i was 9 :S 023. First piercing(s): my ears . 024. First best friend: i dont wanna name her . 025. First award: cant rmbr... 026. First sport you joined: gymnastic 027. First pet: stinky and rascal ( awh, i miss them ) 028. First vacation: er... cant rmbr 029. First concert: too many to rmbr xD 030. First crush: he's name is Sean Wong CURRENTLY : 031. - 048. is missing xD 049. Eating: gummi bears . hehe 050. Drinking: kicKAPOO ;P 052. I'm about to: scream YOUR FUTURE : 053. - 057. is missing too . 058. Want kids: yeah . 059. Want to get married: sure . 060. Careers in mind: *blank ; cricket sounds* wait, marketing i guess? 061. - 067. is missing, yet again WHICH ONE IS BETTER: 068. Lips or eyes: lips ;P 069. Hugs or kisses: hugs AND kisses ;D 070. Shorter or taller: taller . duhh 071. Sun or rain: rain 072. Romantic or spontaneous: both . 073. Nice stomach or nice arm: abs x) 074. Sensitive or loud: a lil bit of both . 075. Hook-up or relationship: relationship . 076. Black or white: def black 077. Trouble maker or hesitant: i dun nyuuuu . HAVE YOU EVER : 078. Kissed a stranger? : erm, maybe :S :S 079. Drank bubbles: haha, yesh, when i was still very much younger . silly me . 080. Lost glasses/contacts: didnt lose them, someone broke it . *points at Jason* 081. Ran away from home: thought of it . 082. Liked someone younger: nyuuuu waay! 083. Liked someone older: state the obvious, much? 084. Broken someone's heart: nahh.. 085. Been arrested: would love to, just for the fun of it 086. Turned someone down: hmmmm... 087. Cried when someone died: when he died . 088. Liked a friend: oh yesh DO YOU BELIEVE IN: 089. Yourself: not much at all . 090. Miracles : not sure . 091. Love at first sight: once upon a time . 092. Heaven: have you seen one? 093. Santa claus: ppssfftt! neverrrrr 094. Sex on a first date: *drools* lmao 095. Gay Marriages: ermm..? 096. Angels: kinda . ANSWER TRUTHFULLY : 097. Is there one person you want to be with right now? : MARCUS! so that i can slap the hell outta him! but hug him first 098. Had more than one boyfriend/girlfriend at a time? : oppsie 099. Do you believe in God? : should i? 100. tag 5 people. i. whoever ii. feel like doing iii. or want iv. to do this v. survey xoxo

Something I Can Never Have by Nine Inch Nails

I still recall the taste of your tears. Echoing your voice just like the ringing in my ears. My favorite dreams of you still wash ashore. Scraping through my head 'till I don't want to sleep anymore. [Chorus:] You make this all go away. You make this all go away. I'm down to just one thing. And I'm starting to scare myself. You make this all go away. You make this all go away. I just want something. I just want something I can never have You always were the one to show me how Back then I couldn't do the things that I can do now. This thing is slowly taking me apart. Grey would be the color if I had a heart. Come on tell me You make this all go away. You make this all go away. I'm down to just one thing. And I'm starting to scare myself. You make this all go away. You make this all go away. I just want something. I just want something I can never have In this place it seems like such a shame. Though it all looks different now, I know it's still the same Everywhere I look you're all I see. Just a fading fucking reminder of who I used to be. Come on tell me You make this all go away. You make this all go away. I'm down to just one thing. And I'm starting to scare myself. You make this all go away. You make this all go away. I just want something. I just want something I can never have I just want something I can never have xoxo

Happy Valentine's Day!

hehe ;D have a lovely valentine!

The ever popular rose is still the nation's favourite flower to give on February the 14th. Dark red roses with thorns are the pinnacle of Valentine's roses. The deep colour suggests a deep love, while the thorns serve as a reminder that love and happiness can follow from suffering. The red rose also has associations with Venus, the Roman goddess of love, and as such has further bound the flower to symbolising ultimate romance. While red roses convey passion and a deep connection, you could also send yellow roses; another emblem for love. White roses symbolise innocence, and could be a charming gift for a burgeoning romance. Pink roses are also a good choice for a new relationship. They convey happiness with the relationship, but none of the pressure associated with the depth of feeling expressed through red roses.

and... happy valentine's day, David ;p thanks so much for the bouquet of pink and white roses ;D xoxo

this is interesting... dont you think so?

i love guitars and always have ;D but ive stopped playin mine for months now, been busy lately . gah, gotta start playing and mayb, get back into classes? lol got this from keee, thanks bro ;D and i got this from the related section lmao! check this out! didnt like the beginnin tho, but the rest is.. wow? lol.. xoxo

interior design...

for my future bedroom & bathroom . you know it, im thinkin... purple, lavender, maroon, black , white and blue . the usual favourite colors, for the wall and such. bedroom : black, maroon and lavender bathroom : blue / purple and white here's a few pictures. pls let me know what you think of it . and which you like best. Bathroom A Bathroom B which do you like best? Bedroom A i like this the most . and obviously the rose poster at the back, on the wall . well alike me? lol Bedroom B Bedroom C Studyroom, this will probably be in my room i suppose . just the table and side fitting for books? xoxo

im back!! anyone missed me? :p

hunnies, im so sorry for not coming online for bout more less than 2 WEEKS!! reasons : 1. banned from internet *figured, said Hazy* lol 2. been goin out, alot :D 3. busy cleaning / packing up the house 4. hailat internet got cut down 5. wasnt anywhere near the laptop hope you all have had an awesome CNY? yes, no? owels... i did, partly . slightly different this year . why? 1. i, myself, friggindaughterofalldevils kept on losing money on gambling . kept on giving others the luck of winning money .___. 2. didnt visit ppl's castle to collect ang paus 3. didnt went back hometown 4. did not, i repeat, DID NOT collect loads/ more amount of ang paus . therefore, there wasnt much . im serious 5. i felt sick. enough said. my birthday, thanks so much for the wishes and pressies :D thanks Katherine, i love the earrings Jie Ling, for the giant chocolate bars! antony, for the cake etc... the rest, no pressies, but your wishes meant alot!

its the thought that counts ;D

U-jin, Hazy, Jin Yin, Carissa, Kai Woon, Abigail, Katherine, Azree, Christopher, Mika, David, Vinnie, Aubrie, Stephen, Ryan, etc.. THANKS SO MUCH!! *hugs* Mika, my darl who's in hawaii, thanks for your msgs . never thought you'd rmbred!! i miss you :) and i miss Marcus, terribly *sobs* fuck! te estrano, ... ? how long havent we talked? im sorry for my misunderstanding . my partner in crime, the sweetness in disguises, heaven or hell, i friggin miss/ hate you . OH! ive got design ideas for my future room / house, will post some pictures sometime soon kies? and... HAPPY 20th BIRTHDAY, AUBRIE!! all the best wishes in everything you do! xoxo

infiltrating inquisition

"It's a shame in a way cause I feel that I may not ever find the right one for me Did I leave him, is he right in front of my face, oh Will my true love ever be? Why would I go on a search again When I know what the end will be What good is love when it keeps on hurting me?" -Stacie Orrico xoxo

Liquid Jump Up

Liquid Jump Up 2 February @ Bar Blonde featuring AZ-1, Jasmine, Raze & Radzy + MC Reza anyone goin? pls let me know^^ xoxo

take me ; by papa roach

Take me and let me in Don't break me and shut me out [Chorus:] So take me and let me in Don't break me and shut me out I lit my pain on fire And I watched it all burn down Now I'm dancing in the ashes And theres no one else around Cause I wanna be apart of something This is just a story of a broken soul [Hook:] As days go by, my heart grows cold I can't seem to let this all pass me by [Chorus x2] I'm burning in the heavens And I'm drowning in a hell My soul is in a coma And none of my friends can tell That I'm reaching out and getting nothing This is just a story of a broken soul [Hook] [Chorus x2] Don't shut me out Does anyone around me feel the same Put your fist up and vent your pain Does anyone around me feel the same Put your fist up and vent your pain Does anyone around me feel the same Put your fist up and vent your pain Does anyone around me feel the same Put your fist up and vent your pain [Hook] [Chorus x2] [Hook] Take Me Don't Break Me xoxo

you've gotta listen to one of these.

these two are on of Laura Sullivan's music. nice kan? :D xoxo

i can never stop listening to this song && i love GTO! Onisuka rocks :D

Shizuku; Drop 2nd Ending Song of GTO Subete no hito wo aiseru wake ja nainara, semete aisuru hito o Uragi razu ni utagawazu ni, semetari nikundari shinai de Mujaki de irukoto ga, hito o kizutsukete shimau no? Shizukana jounetsu ga hitomi no oku de sawagi dasu... anata ni meguri aete Kobore souna namida no tsubu, nagasazu mune ni tamete Isshun o tsuyoku iki yo, ichizuna shizuku ni natte Junsui na aijou ga, itsu atte dareka o madowa shiteru Akiramenaide inori mashou, sekai ga tatoe kurayami demo Jibun ni hokoreru, tatta hitotsu o mitsuke dasou KOTOBA ni dekinai yume ga ryoute ni afuretemo, dare nimo somaranai yo Hateshinai toki no naka de, jibun no nani ga dekiru Ima wa mada chiisaku demo, kagayaki keseya shinai yo Suidou no KARUKI ga SHINKU no fuchi ni tamatte, sonomama tokesou ni nai Kagaku kankyou mochiron aijou mo, zenbu onaji jigen de kangaeru Nanika hitotsu jibun ni shika dekinai KOTO, mitsuke dasetara Hoka ni wa nanimo iranai desho, sorega saikin wakatte kita desho Ookina gan no youna tokai no sumikko de, nani ka o sukoshi zutsu x3 kaete ikitai Dare ka o honki de shinshoku shitetai Kesa no TEREBI wa tooi dokoka no, nikumi au dare ka o utsushiteta Hateshinai toki no naka de, jibun no nani ga dekiru Ima wa mada chiisaku demo, kagayaki keseya shinai yo Kobore souna namida no tsubu, nagasazu mune ni tamete Isshun o tsuyoku iki yo, ichizuna shizuku ni natte ........................................ english version ; lyircs If you can't love everyone, at least do not Betray, suspect, accuse, or hate the ones you love Does being innocent mean that I will hurt people? A quiet passion begins to stir within my eyes... after meeting you Teardrops are about to fall; I don't let them, holding them within my heart Live each moment to the fullest; become a focused drop Pure love is always leading someone astray Let's pray without giving up, even if the world has turned dark Let's find the one thing that I can be proud to myself about Even if dreams that I cannot put into words fill both of my hands, I won't let myself be affected by anyone What can I do in these neverending times? Even though the spark is faint right now, you can't put it out The tapwater's chlorine deposits have accumulated on the sink's edge and doesn't seem like it'll ever dissolve I think of even the scientific environment and love at the same level If you find the one thing that only you can do, You need nothing else, right? You've come to realize that lately, right? From a corner in the city that's like a huge boulder, I want to change something, little by little by little I want to infiltrate someone for real This morning, the TV was showing people somewhere far away who hated each other What can I do in these neverending times? Even though the spark is faint right now, you can't put it out Teardrops are about to fall; I don't let them, holding them within my heart Live each moment to the fullest; become a focused drop xoxo

Onisuka ; enough said ;p

1st Ending song of GTO Futari de Tooku e ikou Atarashii kimochi Kyou mo sagashi ni Kimi to futari nara Norikoe rareru yo Atarashii ashita Tanoshimitai kara Hitomi wo hiraite Tobira hiraku Me no mae ni hirogaru sekai Soto ni detai oki ni iri no oto wo tsurete Osanai koro no kankaku Ajiwau Aitakute demo aenakute Afureru kimochi tada dakishimete Hitodoori ooi toori aruite ite mo Atama ni mawaru anata no egao Taiyou no hikari Abiru watashi wa koko ni iru yo Kuraberu yori Ima no jibun wo taisetsu ni suru PAZURU no saigo no WAN PIISU Sugu soba ni aru no ni misugoshiteta Sudoorishiteta takusan no yasashisa Ima nara sunao na kimochi agerareru Mimi ni nokoru ano koro futari de kiiteta kyoku Sabishikunai Mou kanashikunai tte koto ni shitoku Hito no nagare Machi wa ukare Kaze ni fukare Karada azuke Itsumo no keshiki Chigatte mieru Tsukutte yuku Watashi no RUURU Watashi ni kakeru KORE ga kikkake nara Ima nara kitto kimi no moto ni sunao ni yukeru Futari kiri de Tooku e ikou Atarashii kimochi Kyou mo sagashi ni Kimi to futari nara Norikoe rareru yo Atarashii ashita Tanoshimitai kara xoxo

credit goes to nicky :]

for letting me listen to this song on your ipod.(。・∀・。) (tho you took it back b4 i could even finish listenin to faber drive's *grins* ) heard it on radio but didnt bother bout it. but when listenin to it's lyrics. it caught my attention and i like it. so got home and went searching for the song. lol Closed off from love I didn’t need the pain Once or twice was enough And it was all in vain Time starts to pass Before you know it you’re frozen But something happened For the very first time with you My heart melted to the ground Found something true And everyone’s looking round Thinking I’m going crazy But I don’t care what they say I’m in love with you They try to pull me away But they don’t know the truth My heart’s crippled by the vein That I keep on closing You cut me open and I Keep bleeding Keep, keep bleeding love I keep bleeding I keep, keep bleeding love Keep bleeding Keep, keep bleeding love You cut me open Trying hard not to hear But they talk so loud Their piercing sounds fill my ears Try to fill me with doubt Yet I know that the goal Is to keep me from falling But nothing’s greater Than the rest that comes with your embrace And in this world of loneliness I see your face Yet everyone around me Thinks that I’m going crazy, maybe, maybe But I don’t care what they say I’m in love with you They try to pull me away But they don’t know the truth My heart’s crippled by the vein That I keep on closing You cut me open and I Keep bleeding Keep, keep bleeding love I keep bleeding I keep, keep bleeding love Keep bleeding Keep, keep bleeding love You cut me open And it’s draining all of me Oh they find it hard to believe I’ll be wearing these scars For everyone to see I don’t care what they say I’m in love with you They try to pull me away But they don’t know the truth My heart’s crippled by the vein That I keep on closing You cut me open and I Keep bleeding Keep, keep bleeding love I keep bleeding I keep, keep bleeding love Keep bleeding Keep, keep bleeding love You cut me open and I Keep bleeding Keep, keep bleeding love I keep bleeding I keep, keep bleeding love Keep bleeding Keep, keep bleeding love You cut me open and I Keep bleeding Keep, keep bleeding love xoxo